Trust Worthy Not Perfection

    He has total trust in me. Oh my can it really be?  I struggled with this for a very long time. I really didn't want all that it meant.  My husband felt just fine when he left me with the kids and the house as he traveled each year for harvest. In 2009 this was an extremely hard place for me to be as the harvesting  season kept him from home for 123 days but who was counting right?
   For me every new challenge that came in that year I would cry out to God saying," Why are you teaching me this!" I remember having the fear of what was to come with the new skills I was forced
 to learn that year.  We have all been in a place of fear before.  It may be just not knowing directions to somewhere you need to get or fear of not knowing how a job interview will go. All these fears are only because we carry the load alone, we forget that God is more than in control of every step in our life.

   My husband kept telling me it was ok he had 100% confidence in me in 2009.  Without that I would have struggled even more that year.  I still don't know the purpose of all the Lord had taught me in that year other than I am more capable than I ever thought I could be.
  This year I am working on renewing my own knowledge that I am capable to do whatever lays ahead of me as long as I remember that God is my strength and courage.  When I feel no one else thinks I should have to, or that they could never make it in my situation. I realize that this is the life God gave me as a wife to strengthen my walk with him. 
  We all have things that we are to do to make ourselves trust worthy towards our spouse each household is different; my husband likes to know that I can stick to our budget and that we have food on the table that is eatable (I cook but am not a chef). He prefers our house be livable(I am not a maid) yes, he has learned to be very basic with me as a wife. 
  Remember you don't need to be perfect for your husband to feel 100% confident in you.  I didn't always believe him when I felt so beat down by my mind or Satan's whispers in my ear.  We as woman put our expectations so high but God and our husbands just need use to be trust worthy with what they give us.

Dear Lord,
I thank you for all you give me to do today; that I can use it to honor my husband in the way you long for me to do.  Lord I have not always remembered to serve you by serving my husband so help me to see what actions I can do to serve you and my husband today and in the days to come. 
In your son Jesus Christ Truly Truly Amen